At just before 2am, I started shivering. Violently. By 3am, as the rain battered my tent, I had put on every item of clothing in my bag: pyjamas, golfing mid layers, a hoodie, shorts, a pair of jeans, and extra socks. I was still cold.
The occasional flatulence coming from a nearby tent I could handle (we all do it), but the non stop snoring was too much. It was like I was sleeping amongst a herd of cattle.
This morning, after just one night, I packed up and left.
I got excited at the start of the year, deciding that I would be going to Royal Portrush for the 153rd Open as a fan (no working). Given the price of accommodation (punchy), I would do it on the cheap. I would camp.
Two years ago, I did a two-day stint in The Open Camping Village at Hoylake. I can't say I loved it, but that's just me - not a happy camper. The set-up was decent, with a bar, plenty of food options, and on-site entertainment that made for a great atmosphere.
As campsites go, it was top level. The problem is, it's still camping - no big comfy mattresses, too much noise, pesky insects, shared toilets - and people. Lots of people.
Nevertheless, I thought this year might be different, especially given the recent heatwave in the UK. I wouldn't even need a tent, I'd be sleeping under the stars.
Assuming that there would also be hosepipe bans in operation 300 miles away in County Antrim, I left my home near Liverpool without packing waterproofs; confident that the weather would be favorable, I didn't even pack a sleeping bag.
Other essentials to be confidently omitted included: bug spray, a pillow (easy to use a pile of clothes), a torch, snacks, ear plugs, and waterproofs.
Check-in went smoothly, and I even started to look forward to spending the night outdoors. To avoid getting up in the night, I avoided the bar and made myself comfortable on my blowup mat with a good book.
It wasn't until about 10pm when I realized I was in trouble. The wind had picked up and the temperature in my tent was dipping fast. I put on a FootJoy gilet and a pair of jeans and turned off the torch on my iPhone (you don't need a torch to go camping).
Instead of a sleeping bag, I'd packed a lightweight cotton bed sheet, which I soon discovered belonged to my 11-year-old son, making it necessary to curl up into the foetal position in order to keep my feet warm.
Golf fans camping prior to the 153rd Open at Royal Portrush
By this point the snoring had started. I've never heard a noise like it. I'd regretted not having a nightcap. Perhaps I wasn't too late. I got up to check. It was. On the way back, the heavens opened, so I took shelter in the toilets, which I must admit were very clean (although, sadly, not clean enough to sleep in).
The next two hours were difficult, but I dug in, thanks largely to a gripping Ken Follett fiction, but after 70 pages I was in desperate need of rest (I'd been awake since 4am to catch the first flight to Belfast).
However, it wouldn't come. I continued to put on extra layers, including golf shoes (ECCO Biom G2) and a pair of boxer shorts that I wrapped around my head to try and block out the snoring from next-door.
By 4am I accepted the fact that I wouldn't be getting any sleep. I scrolled through my phone looking at pictures of my dog in attempt to lift my spirits, counting down the minutes before the 6.45am shuttle to the course.
When the sun started, I could have wept. The temperate in the tent started to rise again; in fact, it became roasting in just minutes - so off came the gilets, the jeans, the pyjamas and spare socks.
I'd have stayed for a shower (God knows I needed one), but it was time to check out. Not even the smell of bacon could stop me from breaking into a light jog for the shuttle.
Don't let me put you off camping, whether it be at this year's Open or next year at Royal Birkdale.
There's always a great buzz at The Open Camping Village
Personally, I don't see the appeal, although when hotels and B&Bs inflate their prices (supply and demand and all that), it's the most affordable option if you want to stay close to the action.
And if you are going to camp, check the Met Office app before you travel. It can rain in the summer, sometimes very hard, and it does tend to get colder at night.
Take ear plugs, too, because there will be someone nearby who snores and makes other noises.
Right, time to check out booking.com. A nice little semi detached overlooking the course will do.
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