Birdies and Bogeys – Thynne Friday

Luke Norman, news editor

Easter Sunday, Guy Fawkes Day, the Queen?s birthday, May Day? just some of the unforgettable annual memorials stuck in our national consciousness. Be prepared to add another, one of such magnitude that it won?t be surprising if George Dubya himself immediately declares it a day of international celebration ? THYNNE FRIDAY is coming.

Let me explain, assistant editor John Thynne is a friendly, albeit folically?challenged, beast, one of those characters that you would be very happy to take home to your mother and father, if of course you happened to be a nice young lady (no Pamela Anderson types need apply thank you). Anyway back to business, Johnny Johnson (as we like to call him) is a very dutiful husband, Dad and brilliant second in command here, however, on the (very) rare occasions the GM team leave the office and head to the nearest watering hole, Johnson gives just the slightest of indications that a murkier beast lurks somewhere deep inside as he consumes his Guinness with true vigour and jealously eyes the flashing fruit machines, before of course, being reined in by his strong homing instincts. Not a trait shared by the general majority, I?m afraid.

So the GM Hit Squad (self-appointed) have decided that we ought to take advantage of all being at the Open together and take Senor Thynne out on the town, get him to let his hair down? metaphorically speaking of course. Endless meetings have been held, numerous calls placed and every policeman north of Watford alerted. Friday July 20 will be a day to remember.

The plan so far is to leave Carnoustie at around 8.00pm (after a day spent providing you with the best coverage out there), take in a couple of swift ones (for John at least) at the Open Arms before heading for a curry. After this the real fun begins as we plan to don shell suits and hit Dundee. Apologies if you hail from this neck of the woods but we have been reliably informed it is the perfect place for Thynne Friday. Various establishments have been suggested and more are readily welcome ? please got to the forum ? but as long as the words ?dentist chair, funnel and double tequila slammers? don?t seem unnatural, we will be there.

So if you happen to be passing through the eastern Scotland seaboard in the early hours of Saturday morning please don?t be alarmed if you spot a 6ft3in semi-naked, balding man in glasses bellowing about Bannock Burn and heaving a fruit machine on his shoulder. Just remember it?s Thynne Friday.